My To Do List

For the first time in about a year I don’t have to wait for a plumber, or heat pump person, or phone person, or any other type of repair person. Oh sure, I do have to call the put a new attic fan in my roof people to come out and put a new attic fan in my roof, replacing the old one that sounds like a chipper/shredder when we flick the breaker back on, but I wanted to savor one weekend where I wasn’t waiting on a repair person, and to catch up on the list of things I need to do.

Its 10 am, and so far on my full page list of things to do, I’ve crossed off 4 items. These were items that required that I sit on my ass in front of the computer and order things, like: Father’s day gift. Check, that’s done. Of course, this gift isn’t for my father, as I’d be a bit silly to be sending something to someone that sits in a box in my mom’s living room (please note, he’s cremated... there isn’t a casket sitting in my mother’s living room, nor a mummified body or anything like that). I did (to do item #2) order a bug zapper for my mom though. I figure that since I have no gift to give to my deceased dad, she might as well benefit from this. She likes killing bugs, so what better gift could there be than a bug zapper. That and the starbucks card I promised would be in the mail for her birthday back in March.

Item #3 was to update my work resume. Ok, so I actually did that last night, but its on the list, its crossed off and I’m calling that a minor accomplishment of this day. Item #4, same thing, did it last night, but hey... I’m the one keeping score here.

I look at the rest of the items and scowl. They all pretty much require me to get off my butt. Some require me to travel, and some will no doubt cause me to sweat.

Staining the back yard stair railing, for instance, makes me nauseous. If it were a matter of just going outside with a brush, can of stain, slap it on and be done with it, then no biggie. No, it can’t be that easy, as we’ve (and when I say “we” I actually mean “me”) not stained that railing since it had been put in and there’s this green stuff growing on the stop, which probably needs to be cleaned off prior to applying the stain. This would require the use of water, a scrub brush, and energy, of which I only have two of those things. Then I would need to let it dry, then I could stain it.

Of course I didn’t mention the fact that there is a robin’s nest perched on our deck lattice barrier thingy on the deck, which just happens to be above the staining/cleaning area, which is filled with baby birds that poo a purple vile concoction. My dogs call it the “tweet dispenser” (if my dogs could talk, they don’t, nor do I hear their voices in my head, just wanted to be clear on that) There is a good chance that my standing in that area will result in a not so pleasant experience and a general hatred for baby birds. If I have a general hatred for baby birds, then I will be more likely to allow the dogs in the yard around the time that the baby birds are just learning to fly and allow nature to take its course (removing said dead baby birds from the mouths of my dogs before they can be consumed because baby birds are filled with nastiness).

Now I have justified why I shouldn’t go out and stain the railing, as it will cause innocent baby birds to die.

Get propane for the grill. I have no idea how this chore befell me, as the whole deck and grill thing was suppose to be my husband’s responsibility. I guess its that whole “you only work 4 days a week therefore you should spend that friday being miserable and doing things you hate doing, exactly as if you were at work” mentality he has. He’s miserable, therefore I should be miserable too.

My thoughts of hauling an empty propane tank, then hauling a full propane tank are not very happy. Although you rarely hear of propane tanks exploding for no reason in cars transporting them, I’m sure it does happen, especially if you are caught in some high speed chase involving Steven Seagal and a random bullet hits your car, striking the tank and blowing you and the bad guys up, but collateral damage is to be expected when thwarting bad guys.

Sigh, I’m guessing not a lot will get done today, as usual, except now I don’t have an excuse.