Hello, Its Me Again

Yes, I know we had some rough words when we last saw each other... ok, I had rough words, you just sat there, but you have to understand, I thought I was ready to step out on my own and go about my life, but things happened differently than what I expected.

I had no idea that sitting around on my butt for the past 6 weeks in that stupid boot, unable to do any sort of exercising would make me do it again, but there I was, shoving anything edible in my mouth with both hands, feeling all blobby again, so I just had to do it... yes, I starting shooting up heroin. Ok, that’s not true, I just started smoking again.

AHA, see, you are all freaked out. Look at how well I manipulated you, if I had just said that I had started smoking you would have been all “oh you suck , your such a faily failure!”, but after saying I was doing something horrible, you are all like “oh, whew, man you had me scared and freaked out, so smoking isn’t so bad after all”... yeah, but I’m betting with all the taxes its probably teh cheaper to make crack in my own bathtub, but yeah, its ONLY smoking.

So, Dear Chantix, its me again. Thank you for the wonderful side effects with the bizarro dreams, the waking up at 3am and not going back to sleep. I look forward to the noxious gas and uncontrollable bowels again. I missed you so.

It's ok, nothing to see here

This afternoon I went to make hubby a latte. I have one of these wonderful machines:
Its a Starbucks Sirena. I have no idea why they stopped making these, they're fantastic. Easy to use, easy to clean, it makes lattes fast and they are mighty tasty. Haven't had any problems with it... until today.

Plugged it in and hit the on button. Nothing happened. Hit the on button again. Nothing. Unplugged it and plugged it in again, hit the on button... nothing. It was at this point that a very low keening noise came from my throat. Hubby knows this sound. "what's wrong?" I explained that the latte machine wasn't turning on. I moved aside, because men like to see these things for themselves, and for all he knows I forgot to plug it in or something mundane like that. He plugged it in, hit the button... nothing. He unplugged it and plugged it in... nothing. He plugged the rice cooker in and it worked.

"its broke" he pronounced.

I did this:

I mean, come on, what else is there to do when your coveted and very expensive latte machine is pronounced "broke". Holy crap, I mean we drink a lot of latte, but not enough to break it. Besides, its not like I was using it and it began to smoke and make strange exploding noises or anything for christ's sake, I mean it was just sitting there, worked fine last time I used it and now broke? It spontaneously just broke while it was sitting there? What breaks by just sitting there? Did some part just fall off in there for no real reason? Was there an earthquake that nobody felt but the Sirena, and it caused all sorts of internal issues? How does something break when its just sitting there?????

Oh, the part that plugs into the actual unit had come unplugged... never mind.

WTF?

I've been in a foul mood lately (sorry hubby), getting all wrapped up in the stupid economy, future craptastic healthcare scheme, and just everything seemingly going to crap in a handbasket all at the same time. Hey, go figure, that's life, but still, does it ALL have to go to crap at the same time.

Frankly, I should look at my petty little inconveniences and actually feel thankful for them. I could have it much worse, and other people do, so I should just say "hey, that's life, it is what it is" (a saying I learned from my lawyer) and move on, but sometimes its just nice to swim in lake me and feel gloom and doom over stupid things and drive your hubby insane, like telling him the same thing over and over again because frankly you can't remember if you told him, or was it just a conversation you had in your head, or did you post it to Facebook and not tell him, and even if you did post it to Facebook, did he even read it?

I think that perhaps social media is driving me slowly insane, because I really don't know if I say things outloud, did I text it, did I post it, did I twitter it, did I SMS it, or did I e-mail it, and if I did, who did I post it to?

I've been telling people (I think) that I only have one more week in LarrWii, the Wii soft cast, but then I actually looked at a calendar and discovered that I actually have 2 weeks left. LarWii is getting a bit... rank. I had to spray him down in febreeze, and apparently you can wash the foamy innards, but I have no idea if that's true or not and I don't want to ruin it when I have to wear it, so I've been freshening the foam up with some Febreze and hope that I don't reek to high hell with each footstep.

Tonight we had a rainstorm. We need rain, but we didn't need three months of rain in an hour, so our sump pump drain pipe got a tad bit overwhelmed and was backwashing out near the house. Whoot. Then as I was folding clothes from the dryer, our heat/pump was making that distinct: "you haven't cleaned out the pvc pipe with bleach like you should have months ago so I'm not clogged and spewing water all over the cheap air filter thing, which you only have one left, so get out the bleach and snake and clear me out before I freeze something and cost you a bazillion dollars to fix/replace that you don't have" noise.

Right now one of my dogs is shrieking at me because its way past our bedtime (according to him) and he'll sit there and shriek until I go up and feed him oyster crackers just so he can stomp all over me, steal half the bed and shove his frito feet in my face throughout the night. Gosh I love my pups. I really do because today I found out that a friend of mine lost one of her beloved pups. It really takes a loss to make you realize the things you should shrug off and take in stride, and how you really need to stop and smell the puppies and realize that with all of the stupid inconveniences, the crap, the bills, the lack of money, the things that break, and the things that just don't work out... the most important things in life are those fuzzy creatures that steal your bed, and the hubby that accuses you of elbowing him in the eye at night.

Everything else is was it is.