Toms vs Bobs

A while back I bought a pair of red Tom's canvas shoes that were all the rage ($50).  Nice concept, where you buy a pair of shoes and they send a pair to needy people or something.

I saw someone wearing them at a graduation, asked about them and the woman swore by them.  So comfortable, stylish, blah blah.

Fine, ordered a pair, the arrived. 

Initially I was like "ok, these are nice flats" and then walked into our kitchen and nearly slid 5 feet and fell on my ass. 

The bottoms are made of Crisco.  Ok, not Crisco, it's felt (I think) and holy crap are they slippery.  Even on some carpets you slide around out of control.  Don't even get me started about what happens if you walk in the rain.

I tried, really I did.  I tried to wear them, I tried to like them, but they are worthless for walking.  They look fabulous on your feet... just don't walk in them.  I felt guilty about the fact that I bought a pair, and now some poor person got a pair and they're sliding around all helpless on top of being poor.

I donated them to charity and searched for something similar in red (because red goes with 99% of my clothes), but didn't want to end up with another $50 disappointment.

A friend suggested Bob's by Sketchers.

Same concept: you buy a pair of shoes and they donate to Petco charities, which I really like more than the Tom's thing and I'm also assuming that the donation isn't a pair of shoes because what cat is going to wear shoes.  Bought some ($40).

They arrive and I'm pretty sure whoever makes Toms also makes Bobs except Bobs have rubber soles.  Well, there's an improvement right away.  They also have a very cushy inner, Tom's didn't.

Tried the kitchen test and have to admit that even with the rubber sole, still a bit slippery, but not nearly as slippery as Toms.

I wear a 7.5 and ordered a 7.5 but think I could have ordered a 7 as I have a little space near the toe, but I'm sticking with the 7.5.

They also have some cool designs and stuff here and you can get them on Amazon.

My Style

I've always been in awe of people who walk around looking so "put together".  Whole ensembles that look as though they were matched perfectly in the store, purchased as a group and worn gracefully out into the public.

Then there's me.  I go to a clothing store (usually Kohls) and wander the aisle looking for these adult Garanimal ensembles to no avail.  I'm forced to actually pick a shirt that goes with pants without any sort of assistance and frankly I just don't have the gene for that. 

Same goes with groceries.  I can't simply walk through the aisle and pick out the ingredients for a fabulous meal, even if I food plan with menus, there's something inside of me that just can't get it right.

Invariably I just grab tasty looking things, get home and have no idea what to make with the mish mash of ingredients.

So goes with clothes.  Cute top, pants that fit (and have pockets), get them home and I have no pants to match the shirt, no shirt to match the pants, and don't even get me started on matching shoes or socks.  In the store, I've attempted to find a shirt and pants that match, but thanks to the deceptive store lighting will get them home and discover that it really doesn't "GO" together.

It is my curse, and while discussing this at work with a friend who ALWAYS looks put together and matching I determined that my look is "Urban Bag Lady".

I seriously look as though I just throw on the things I find in a dumpster that look fine individually, but are nothing short of a mess when put together.

This weekend I dragged hubby to Kohls in search of button down shirts.  My goal was to get 5 button down shirts that "go" with black, brown, and blue.  I will then wear these shirts to work with various pants and frankly I go to work to work, not a fashion show or to impress people, but at least I would look semi "put together". 

These button down shirts must be:

• Long enough.  Most shirts reveal too much muffin flab when you raise your arms.
• Sleeves.  I don't want long sleeves because  have long arms and they never make sleeves long enough for me, so I prefer 3/4 sleeves.  No sleeves is a no starter because old lady arm flab is occurring.
• Normal colors.  I have no idea what the hell color pallet is going on lately but NO.
• No ridiculous patterns.  Once again, not sure what insane clown posse is designing women's clothing but they need to stop taking so much LSD.
• Not tailored.  Once again, not sure who is designing these things but they always put the boob part too high, the waist part too thin so it looks like you've got wings over the muffin top flab.
• No glitter crap on them.  Who thought this was a good idea?  They do realize that you throw that into the wash with other things, and the next thing you know you have glitter underwear.

We go into Kohls and I gravitate toward the Sonoma stuff because they have normal styles in non-scratchy fabrics in normal colors.  I peruse the sections and on the wall I spy perfection.  Normal colors, button down, long, 3/4 sleeve... angels sing from on high.

I hunt down the hanger hook to reach the ones hanging near the ceiling and find some larges (I wear a medium, but we all know everything shrinks) and got a blue, grey striped, a lavender, a white, a blue striped with little red dots and giggle all the way to the cashier.

I now have a whole no brainer work week of ensembles and if I feel like it, I can always throw in shirt or two of my existing shirts to mix it up a bit.  

In Defense of the PLB

It is a mystery to me as to why people are repulsed over the idea of a sandwich that I have eaten since childhood.

It seems rational, and not at all as disgusting as others have claimed it to sound.  It's a simple sandwich that the majority of people have probably eaten at one time, it just happens to include one additional ingredient.

I'm talking about the Peanut Butter, Banana, and Lettuce sandwich.

Not just any lettuce will do, it has to be Iceberg lettuce.  Any other type of lettuce isn't actually lettuce (I won't listen to your arguments), it has to be iceberg.

From a practical standpoint it makes sense to add an ingredient that provides a bit of "moisture" to the sandwich. 

Bread is dry, banana is goopy, and peanut butter is dry and goopy, so including a bit of snap and moisture of the lettuce brings it all together, and keeps the other ingredients from adhering to the top of your mouth and teeth like concrete.

I urge you to give it a try.  If you are so inclined, try it with the lettuce on the bottom so you can easily peel it out if the melange repulses you.  Don't complain if you use any other lettuce, or a different type of bread, or substituted pickles for the banana, it's a very simple recipe:

• White bread
• Peanut butter
• Iceburg lettuce
• Banana

Filling, tasty, and comforting.

Welcome (Back)

If you've stumbled upon this blog it may (or may not) look familiar.

It used to be called "Everyday Tales of Woe" and contained a lot of random ranting and some politics.

In 2013 I got tired of ranting (and politics) so I downloaded everything and deleted that blog.

Six (6) years later, after a LOT of changes (that I may or may not blog about) I needed a space to write... so I created Woe and Cookies and purged the politics.

This is a politics-free zone.

This blog is for me.  If you enjoy it, then that's an added bonus.