Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The weekly general brain spew

Once again I wish that I had some kind of interface that would just transcribe all of the wonderful blog posts that I compose in my head while walking through the mall, or in the kitchen, or sitting on the toilet, or wherever I happen to be when I’m NOT sitting in front of my computer where I can actually type them instead of sitting down with nothing in my head forgetting all of those witting things that happened in my life 5 minutes ago because I have the brain of a may fly.

Was that all one sentence?

Whatever. Ok, I’ll try to recreate my day in the usually weekly brain spew of things, which won’t be nearly as funny as they appeared in my head hours ago.

I spent most of the day reading this all 188 pages of it. Before you ask, its for my work, and before you ask, yes I’m insane, and before you ask, no I don’t work for that place listed on the site, that’s just a place that I found that didn’t have the whole PDF file of pain, I was being nice and sparing you all from that horror. If you, for some odd and sadistic reason, want to read the whole thing, you can download the PDF here.

I did manage to tear myself away from this gripping document long enough to go have all you can eat mongolian BBQ with hubby for lunch, then came back and finished it, only to find out that the butler did it and didn’t provide adequate audit control.

As tomorrow is somewhat an “off” day (I still have to write up a monthly status report of what all I did this month, which consists of looking through scraps of paper and trying to decipher what all that scribbling actually means, and research more incredibly boring documentation stuff), hubby and I decided to go to the mall for a latte and walk around.

As I walked out the door, I nearly fell over the two very large boxes that had been plopped in front of it. The APC UPSs had arrived. Wow, holy crap! I only ordered the replacements from APC on Saturday when, tragically, two of our computer UPSs died an hour apart from each other. How convenient. Instead of going to the mall for new ones, hubby mentioned a trade in program that APC has, so I checked it out and found that instead of getting new batteries for these discontinued brands, I could new ones for about the price of the batteries. Cool, so I did that and forgot all about it, thinking it would take a very pissed off and herniated delivery guy a looong time to deliver them. Turns out it took less than 2 days. Impressive! So, since I bitch a lot about stuff that doesn’t work... go to the APC site and trade up your dead UPS. Doesn’t even have to be APC UPS, they’ll take anything.

Anyhoo, there was an accident on the way to the mall and traffic was backed up. I was actually relieved to hear that there was an accident because I was convinced that the 2009 Christmas shopping season had started and the crowds were backed up going to the mall. Thankfully it was just a horrible accident. There was actually ample parking and most of the mall loonies had left, which was good in that I wasn’t being stepped on from behind, but bad in that the even more desperate kiosk vendors were like pirana.

The most notable mall thing was that there was some woman walking past us. She had a really cool gray dress on (casual type) with a really cool black sweater on over it, and really cool black tights... AND BROWN BOOTS!!! I mean seriously! I’m no fashion maven (I was wearing jeans and my wooly mammoth crocs) but come on! If you have a cool outfit like that and don’t have the black boots, then bag the outfit until you get to a freakin shoe store! BROWN BOOTS??

Yep, so that was my mall excitement of the day.

Oh, and earlier I had to go pick up two Christmas cards for my in-laws. Yes, we suck and haven’t sent them anything, but we plan on it. Yes, its the 30th, but there should be SOME christmas cards just hanging out... apparently not. There also aren’t any cards that say “Happy Anniversary, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Years” because yes, we forgot their anniversary too. So, instead... I bought about 7 birthday cards that made me laugh, which I’ll send to my friend... whose name I won’t say, so we’ll just call her Icky, and her daughter Lebeebee, who has a real name, but I’ve called her Lebeebee even before she was born, so that’s her name to me. Ok, so it won’t even be their birthdays when I send them, but hey... why should you just send a birthday card on one day, when you can send them all the time and make people feel that good way that they feel when they turn another year older and that much closer to death?

The problem that I have with sending cards is:
1.) writing something humorous in them. If you just sign your name to it, why not leave it blank so they can re-use it.

2.) Finding stamps, even though I keep them in the same place (my dayplanner) but then there’s the whole “ok, what is postage nowadays” because I have stamps there of several denominations and never know if that’s the right amount, so I end up slapping 2 stamps on... just in case.

3.) Getting the signed, sealed, stamped letter into a mailbox that I check every night after work 10 steps from my front door. Its HARD!

Ok, as I really have no idea what day it is, I’ll stop with the rambling for now. When I started this, I really thought that today was Friday, but apparently not.

1 comment:

  1. I am appalled at your description of the brown boots. What was she thinking??? Also: that work document is depressing and possibly you should consider changing jobs if that is the sort of thing you are forced to read.

    Cards: I don't do Christmas cards as a rule (I know, you got one from me, but really that was more of a thankyou) and people get upset! What is that??!?!?

    Okay it's 2009 in 2 and a bit hours so break out the champagne.

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