Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Taint Watch 2009

It was a very good day for the “taint” count. I actually lost count because I was too busy rolling on the floor trying not to pee my pants when a news person actually said (and I’m not making this up) that “The Senate is trying to take the taint from Burris”.

HOOO Boy doesn’t that conjure up a really unpleasant (yet somewhat not surprising) image in your head!

I see California has found a solution for their economic woes: give taxpayers IOUs instead of their tax refunds. Yeah, that’ll work! Frankly, if I owed the State of California something and instead sent them an IOU, I’m pretty sure they would be cool with that. I really hope that whoever gets an IOU will call California 3 times a day demanding payment, charging interest and penalties along with late fees.

Oh, do you know where your automobile manufacturer bailout money is going to? Why, its going to ensure that you can watch the season premiere of Damages, without commercial interruption, thanks to GM and Cadillac!

Oh, but don’t worry, this was a deal that the company brokered in October 2007, you see, or something like that... waaaay before this whole economy thing broke open. Yeah, they were fine in October 2007 and all that. Besides, it not like they haven’t GIVEN the show a whole slew of cadillacs to drive around in the show, so its like they bought their very own tv show to highlight their cars so you’ll want them... just like you want Glenn Close and those other once upon a time movie stars that are now stuck on the little screen.

For my last bitter thought of the night: what’s the difference between banks, insurance companies, and automaker companies that piddled away their money on lavish homes, vacations, and everything but their business and Madoff?

The answer: Madoff wasn’t sleeping with politicians.

ok, really, one very last thought: The porn industry is now asking for a bailout. Heck, why not.

1 comment:

  1. I'm wondering if "taint" means something different to you lot. Really.

    ReplyDelete